Friday, March 4, 2011

It's working!!!

Well I am happy to report that my 3 yr has not been helping himself to the fridge. In my last post he was not listening and getting into things when he was supposed to be napping. Later in the day, I got out some cracker trail mix for snack for the other two kids. When he asked for some I said " I'm sorry son, you had your snack earlier, when everyone else was sleeping" Oh he was MAD! But I did good and stuck to it, and stayed calm. I continued to say "I'm sorry." When they were done and left he left too and went about his day. But he hasn't got into the fridge without asking since. It's amazing to me that he doesn't have to be reminded. A big thing is giving them confidence in making their own decisions. Boundaries have to be set, that is a given, but it is so awesome to know that they can be set without getting angry, or damaging their precious little self esteem.

Now I would like to fix the mistakes I made with the oldest. That is going to take some time, but I know that it is possible, and I have really seen a change in him the past few weeks. We are beginning to bond once again, and he is even warming up to DH again. He is such a forgiving child, one of his many many great character traits.

As I write I have another little one getting into snacks... oh so sad, because I was going to make some chocolate covered peanuts for tonight. To bad my sweet girl wont be getting any! She just waled in and showed me the cracker that she climbed up to get. My response: "ooohhh, so sad looks like I'm going to have to do something about that. But not now- later. Try not to worry, but you'll have a consequence." Well, consequence is a word that she has tuned into and knows (kind of) what it means. So, "No mom!!!" was what I got as she scurried back to her room where she is supposed to be taking a nap. HAHAHAH!!!! I love when things work!! And the best part is I didn't have to get mad, raise my voice or even get up from the computer! I feel good knowing that SHE made the choice, and that I am learning to be the kind of loving, gentle, and effective mommy that I have always dreamed of!


  1. Wow! I think you are doing a really good job. Today Kaylin got into the banana bread that I had cut and told her she could have a lunch. So at lunch when I ate a piece and she didn't I said, "I'm sorry Kaylin, you already had your piece before lunch." I may not be doing the same parenting program as you are, but there are some things that really work and when you find them you use them all the time!

  2. You ARE a loving, gentle, and effective Mommy...don't be so hard on yourself!!! You've told me here you go!! Tomorrow is a new can start fresh and improve...the kids are learning...and obviously realizing what will give them consequences!! So good job for sticking it out and being able to laugh about things and not get so angry!! You're GREAT!!!